When it comes to Ally's diabetes, there are things that go through my mind that I would never verbalize. I keep them inside because...it would scare Ally...or anyone else that was listening. Heck, these are the kinds of thoughts that scare me! I'm sure that you know these thoughts that scare me.
Lately, I've been having different kinds of thoughts that I wouldn't say out loud. But this time, they are different. Sure, the bottom line of these thoughts is that I am worried about something happening to Ally. Only the most recent ones are more related to me not being there to take care of her.
Keith won a trip for his outstanding performance at work (I know, braggety brag brag brag! But this post is about things that I wouldn't say out loud, so I think it's ok to brag here :) Woo hoo! I'm so excited about this trip for just the two of us! But then, the fear sets in. Keith and I both on a plane together...what if? (There are some things that I can't even type out loud!)
Keith and I both being that far away at the same time? My mom is very capable of taking care of Ally and her diabetes. But what if ??
I have been having an odd tenderness on an area of one of my tatas. I'm not letting myself get worked up about it. I believe it is from my 2 year old. Not sure how it happens, but I feel like I get knocked there by her a lot. I'm planning to get it checked out. But in the meantime, one of those thoughts did creep into my head. What if...??
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~What I can't say out loud is...What if something happened to me? What would happen to Ally? Who would take care of her???