February 10, 2012

Three Years Already?

Three years ago today...February 10, 2009!

Ally was just 5 years old.  She was in kindergarten.  She was in ICU at Children's Hospital with a diagnosis of Type 1 Diabetes.  She was in DKA (Diabetic Ketoacidosis).

You know how they say time flies?  Usually, we say that time flies when you are having fun.  Nothing about having diabetes is fun!  I just can't believe it has been 3 years.  It seems impossible that Ally has been living with diabetes for almost 1/3 of her life.  In so many ways, I still feel new to this life. 

Maybe it does seem like three years when I think about how different our lives are now and how long its been since I've slept through the night. 

I guess it has been 3 years when you realize that...I can spout off the carb count for anything from half an apple, without its skin to 4.5 oz of a blizzard from Dairy Queen...I can do a site change in a matter of a minute (something that once took me a good 20 minutes!)...Heck, I can even do a site change in the dark!...I can tell her how many carbs to enter and know approximately what the bolus should be even before her pump's "Bolus Wizard" calculates it for us...I don't get squeemish at the site of blood anymore...I can let her out of my sight for a short time, trusting that she knows what to do if she feels low...I can check a blood sugar in my sleep (and very rarely get the wrong kid!)...I can explain how the pancreas and insulin should work in a person's body...I wake up at 2:58 am, before my 3:00 am alarm goes off.

And finally, we know its been 3 years when our family and friends don't understand our language.  For example, "put in 40, dual wave, 50/50 for 1:30".  (For those of you living parallel lives to ours...no explanation necessary, I know!)  But our family and friends look at us like we are speaking alien.  By the way, that jibberish means that Ally should enter 40 carbs into her pump, setting it for a dual wave, where 50% of the insulin will be administered right away and the other 50% will be delivered a little bit at a time over the next hour and a half. 

Even Ally said this morning, "I can't believe I've had diabetes for 3 years!"  Then she got a really shocked look on her face and said, "MOM!  Justin Beiber wasn't even popular back then!"  Oy!

The picture of Ally that has been on the header of this blog was taken in kindergarten.  Just a couple of months before her diagnosis, over 3 years ago.  I have often looked at that picture and thought that I needed to update it, as she has grown so much!  I just have not been able to make myself change it.  I love this picture!  It was instantly one of my favorites - love that toothless smile!  And now, years later, it still is a favorite.  Now I can see the innocence, the freedom, the carefreeness of my little girl in that picture.

When I look at that picture, I know that she had not yet felt the scary feeling of a low blood sugar, or the anxious feeling of a high blood sugar.  I know that she was not attached to a medical device that was keeping her alive.  I know that her fingers were not sore and laden with black spots from all the finger pricks.  I know that she had not yet been scared that she would die.

So, I am going to sit here for a few minutes and just stare at that picture.

Ally, age 5.  Pre-diagnosis.

And now, I will update my blog header with a new picture that speaks to me too.  I now see a courageous, strong and responsible girl.  A girl that makes me so very proud!


  1. She is a beautiful, strong, courageous young lady!

  2. Beautiful picture! I can't believe how big she is!

  3. Oh my word...love both pictures!! Our kids are so brave. And so are the mommies!

    Our d-day is coming in a couple weeks. Only 2 years for us, but like you...I've been thinking about how far I've come. I'm certainly no pro, but I sure have a lot more knowledge and experience under my belt.

    So glad we're in this together!

  4. Love you guys and I hope you have a wonderful day. We must get these girls together one day!!

    btw LOVE THE NEW PIC!!

  5. It's nice to read about others who are farther down this road and making it through the ups and downs. I feel the same about looking at pictures before and thinking about the little things (and the big things) that are different now.

  6. Your daughter is beautiful.. I hope she has a great day today

  7. Dang it, Misty. I'm in tears. Maybe it's because our D day is coming. 3 years for us soon... Maybe it's because she's the same age in that pre dx pic as Sweets is now. Maybe it's because I know what you mean about BEFORE she had ever felt a low or feared for her life. D sucks. But I'm so glad to have found you through this journey.

  8. Your daughter is beautiful in both pictures! Tell her that we say congrats for rocking diabetes for 3 years! My 9 year diaversary was last week.

  9. She's absolutely GORGEOUS, Misty! I completely understand that feeling of looking at pictures from "before".

    Happy 3 years, my friend.

    May the road ahead be filled with continued health and happiness!

  10. I have to say that this made me cry. I look at pictures of my daughter and i always say, this was before diagnoses. It hurts me so much that she has this horrible disease. Emily was diagnosed in March 2011. One yr is coming up. It has been a rough year. But I'm thankful that we have her under control and shes healthy otherwise. Thanks for sharing your story. It helps me to know that I'm not the only Mom that feels the way I do. Ally sure seems like a special girl. You doing an awesome job Misty. Love the new picture.

  11. Well you made me cry too. I can just so relate since my daughter is now 6 and I look at our pictures the same way. I read your blog and think about Natalie's future and where we will be in the next couple of years. I love that picture of your daughter too and the new one as well!

  12. There are a lot of 2- and 3-year anniversaries right now! Those pre-diagnosis pictures are so bittersweet. But the new picture is gorgeous. :)

  13. She is absolutely precious! She's grown, and so have you. Happy diaversary, and I get the dual wave-even my daughter gets it now. Milestones..when they learn to do it themselves! Whew. Praying for you today, girl! I hate when that time of year rolls around, and you remember everything you were doing, it's so bittersweet.
    You should be proud, you've done a great job!! : ) Hugs.

  14. She HAS grown...what a sweetie! I'm so glad we don't have to walk this road alone. Those anniversaries are boogers...full of every single emotion. Praying for a cure so we can start celebrating the anniversary of the day they are cured.


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