I'm just not the mom that I used to be - in many ways, really.
But for today, my apologies go out to all of my playdate pals. I was driving home from a playdate the other day and I realized that I had left without helping to clean up. Once, not too long ago, I would have prided myself on teaching my children good manners. In this case, good manners would be helping to clean up the toys when you have a playdate at someone else's house. I am not being rude, I just have so many things going on in my head all the time that I can't focus. Unfortunately, I missed an opportunity to teach my children this lesson. And I'm hoping that I did not get the "BAD MOM" label and they will invite us back again! Please accept my apology and maybe let me explain myself a little :)
It's like the battle between the good conscience and the bad conscience. You know, like you see in the cartoons - the angelic one sits on one shoulder and the naughty one sits on the other shoulder, both trying to get inside your head.
Well my D-conscience is neither good nor bad, its just constantly inside my head...talking to me...ALL.DAY.LONG.
While I'm sitting there enjoying a little bit of adult conversation, possibly even non-D related....This is what is going on inside my head:
Why is Ally sitting on the swing all by herself?
She's not swinging, just sitting there.
Is she ok?
Back to the adult conversation, but keep glancing back at Ally.
Ok, better check.
"Ally, you ok?"
"Yes, Mom!"
"Then why are you just sitting on the swing, but not moving?"
"I'm just resting Mom."
"Ok."
Back to conversation...although now I have no idea what we were talking about.
After another fun playdate, its time to head home, here's what's inside my head:
Time to go. Let's clean up.
How long has it been since Ally checked her BG?
How long since she has had anything to eat?
Does she look ok?
What type of activity has she been doing?
Should we check her BG now or when we get home?
How long until she eats again?
"Come on kids, let's go."
Gather up diaper bag, D-bag, kids. Get in the car. Head home.
Does she look ok?
I realize that I didn't even offer to help clean up...BAD MOMMY! BAD FRIEND!
They'll never invite us back!
Look back at Ally again. She's resting her head.
"Are you ok, Ally?"
Think again, when was last BG check?
"Yes, Mom!"
How much activity?
She looks ok, but why is she laying her head down?
Duh! She played hard.
But my Ally can never just be tired or worn out from a day of hard play! I have to question everything. I have to think the worst. I have to check! Because if I don't she could suffer from hypoglycemia.
(See definition of hypoglycemia below taken from the JDRF website.)
Low blood sugar (hypoglycemia) is the most common and most dangerous condition for many people with type 1 diabetes. Very low blood sugar may lead to insulin shock, which can be life threatening if not promptly treated. Low blood sugar occurs when the body has too little food/glucose or too much insulin.
The following are all potential reasons that a person with diabetes might have low blood sugar: Too much insulin taken, Eating less than usual, Eating later than usual, Insulin was injected at a site on the body where the absorption rate is faster than usual, Injecting extra insulin after forgetting about a previous dose, More exercise than normal, Illness or injury , Other hormones, Medication interaction
The following is a list of general symptoms that indicate low blood sugar (the person with type 1 diabetes may exhibit one or more of these): Dizziness, Nervousness, Personality change/irrational behavior, Blurry vision, Shakiness, Nausea, Crying, Sluggishness, Sweating, Poor coordination, Hunger, Lightheadedness, Irritability, Drowsiness, Erratic response to questions, Inability to concentrate
So, while I may be annoyed that I can't multi-task like I once could, I am so VERY grateful to the littleSevere symptoms (symptoms as listed above, plus): Convulsions, Unconsciousness
D-conscience inside my head. Because I HAVE TO QUESTION......I HAVE TO CHECK!
